I feel like I can't settle down. I believe that being adjunct is terribly unhealthy. I never feel permanent anymore. Everything is constantly changing - I teach at a community college in Ohio, I teach at a state University in West Virginia, I teach Comp I, Comp II, then Developmental Writing, then online, then in the classroom --- I'm all over the place. I can only hope that this "all-overness" is going to help me earn a full-time position somewhere soon.
I believe that applying for said full-time positions is also unhealthy.
The process itself is very frustrating - and the part that I hate the most: References! It's not that I'm anti-social, because I'm not. I just hate asking people to be a reference for me. I feel like it is putting them in an awkward situation. It isn't so bad when it comes to Comp position applications - I have several people that I can run to for Comp references.
Creative Writing references are the worst. I don't know if I should use the same references - because they can't really say much about my poetry or my ability to teach it. They can only really comment on my rhetoric and composition abilities. I have poet friends - but they haven't seen me teach. And most of them, I haven't met in person, so I don't feel that it would be beneficial to ask them. And, I certainly don't think it's ethical to use my husband, who is a teacher and writer, who has seen my writing and my teaching. I wish I could... but...
I just want to eat. A lot.